Keeping Up With The Kardashians is still one of the top cable television shows in the United States. It’s reality-television format invites us into the lives of wealthy socialites and their antics. It sounds like a dud – but in just over a decade, the show and it’s stars have changed pop culture and re-invented social media for good or worse.

But is there a family in Pakistan that could generate the same amount of absurd shameless fun? We reckon there just might be: the Bhutto-Zardari’s. Find out why we feel Breaking Up With The Bhuttos isn’t such a bad idea.

The Family Prestige

The head honcho of the Kardashian Family, Robert Kardashian, was one of the lawyer’s of OJ Simpson, in what was easily the most famous trial in the history of the United States. Robert became a household figure, and of course, he was always filthy rich. Before he died, he inherited a good sum of money to his daughters alongside the family name. While this may same paltry in terms of what was inherited to Benazir Bhutto and later Bilawal, there are similarities still: family values that are highly libertarian, luxury-oriented and self-indulgent.

Asif Zardari is the Perfect Kris Jenner

Widowed. Children still bear spouse’s last name. Rumoured (if the media is anything to go by) a much younger, more attractive person. Trying achingly to make his children’s career more successful. Yes, there are far too many similarities between Kris Jenner & Asif Zardari.

The Controversies

Wherever you see a Kardashian or a Bhutto-Zardari, you expect to see controversy. It starts with simple accusations of lying to the heavyweight felonies of illegal wealth accumulation and moral degradation of an entire nation: these two lots are never away from their share of hair pulling controversy.

Then there is the whole Ayaan saga – which opens up another bag of worms: whose dating who? Are they in love? Is that a lizard on the wall?

The Bilawal Show

Let’s face it. Bilawal is to the Bhuttos what Kim is to the Kardashians. Sure, he doesn’t have a tape that made them famous, but there are a lot of similarities. Firstly, he’s a big time drama queen. Expect Bilawal to raise a tantrum every now and then. Plus, while we don’t expect him to have a Bruce Jenner-style gender crisis, we will expect friends and family to throw in a jab at his every now and then. That will make for some great television.

The material life and questionable ethics

Love ’em or hate him, almost everyone has an issue with the questionable ethics of the Kardashians: they lie, cheat, steal and downright fake their way through the day to get whatever it is they want in life. Although we are no one to make the analogy, many of these same accusations have been made against the Bhutto’s and Zardari’s for nearly half a century now. Whereas Asif Zardari’s famous challenge of ‘innocent until proven guilty’ may ring true, it also goes to say that it’s not easy proving you guilty when you’re the richest and most powerful man in the country.

Misbah-ul-Haq and Younis Khan have officially said goodbye to the game. Two of the most prolific scorers in the modern-day test game, the duo have often divided cricket fans with their ability to be absolutely world class for a long period of time and then absolutely go bust when it mattered the most. We, the cynics at CurryFlow, round up a list of negligent attributes that we feel should not be ignored as we say goodbye to MisYou.

They were boring as hell

Let’s face it. A lot of us grabbed the remote as soon as these two got out there. Yes, they saved you a lot of test matches and even a few one dayers (Misbah’s sure-fire 50 every other match), but there was zero entertainment value. Zero. As the saying goes, you would rather watch a pair of monkeys fornicate then see a partnership blossom between these two batsmen.

They literally ended Muhammad Yousuf’s career

Muhammad Yousuf was at the peak of his career and all set to become Pakistan’s greatest ever batsmen across all formats – atleast in terms of stats. But then Younis and Misbah happened. Yousuf, for no real drop in form, was dropped from the side due to team chemistry issues and was never to be seen again. His only appearances these days are when he’s trashing Rameez Raja or the occassional Pakistani batsmen on a random television show.

They were tragic heroes who faltered when it mattered the most

For all their match winning exploits, the two unfortunately faltered when it mattered the most. Unlike the likes of Dhoni, Kohli and Inzamam, these two were often not victors at the end of a great innings. At best, they could be considered tragic heroes. This is particularly true of Misbah and less so of Younis, who did manage great numbers in test match wins, although just not the more important ones (Australia, anyone?)

They contributed the most when bowling standards in world cricket dwindled

The retirement of the Akrams, Muralitharans, Warnes, McGraths and so many other all-time great bowlers led to a shortage of truly world class bowlers. This is the main reason so many previously good batsmen became world class in the period starting 2005. Younis and Misbah were no different. As the quality of bowlers in the world became lesser (even more so as T20 took it’s toll), the two mounted impressive numbers in test match cricket – and there was no turning back.

Their statistical idiosyncrasies are far too many

Despite their great test match records, there are many statistical idiosyncrasies that will always stand out when these two are evaluated in the future. Younis Khan’s long and fruitless ODI career with an average of less than 35 and a miserly strike rate. Then there is the fact that Misbah has not managed a single ODI hundred and a strike rate even worse than Khan’s.

Babar Azam and company will soon 

Whenever someone who seems irreplaceable retires, we wonder how in the world will the team come through this? But of-course, that is never an issue in most cases. Someone will come through – they always do in the populated nations of South Asia where there are a number of young stalwarts looking to ooze through the setup and get noticed. Babar Azam, for one – he seems more talented then the both of them combined – and we won’t be surprised if he takes the Kohli route rather than the Khan route. The game has changed.

Hurry! Get to the Choppa!

Cinematic gold, isn’t it? The 1986 Sci-fi classic has not only stood the test of time, but it has exceeded it’s status as a cult classic to be rightly seen as the ‘quintessential 80’s Sci-Fi Action Film’.

Gleefully termed the ‘Manchester of Pakistan’ by those who know little else about it, Faisalabad is undoubtedly one of the greatest cities in the world. If the world consisted of only Punjab.

Hasan Minhaj became the first Muslim to host the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

“A farewell match is my right” – Shahid Afridi

These golden words were uttered by Shahid Afridi just a few weeks into his retirement.

Regardless of reports which state otherwise, Younis Khan has decided to hang his boots

Let’s admit it – for all the flak that our desi damsels get for showing too much skin and crossing

‘You know why people don’t like liberals? Because they lose.” – Jeff Daniel’s

We have come across dozens of weight loss programs and shortcuts each day on the internet

Just like the man himself, Karan Johar’s autobiography has it’s share of contradictions

The waning interest in the movement for restoring Basant has become an distressing issue for a

Our editors have made a list of the very best of almost everything in Lahore.

The article was written in late 2015 and may also be accessed using Medium.